Shooting Through the Gallery

July 8th, 2011

I had an ambitious plan today, and got whooped by the National Gallery. That’s one tough museum to get through, even on roller skates.

I started out early enough, and made my first error when I headed out the door and down the street, having forgotten to brush my teeth. I hate it when I do that. I doubled back, lost 15 minutes, and restarted.

On to Charing Cross, and Trafalgar Square. I took about 40 minutes to take a bunch of photos of Nelson’s Column and the other various Things to See there. None of the photos are unique in any way, shape or form, but it’s the sort of thing I felt compelled to do anyway. After 9/11, and more recently the disasters of 3/11, I have learned to take lots of pictures of every place I visit, because you just never know. Saying “It will always be there” is foolish. It’s obviously not true.

It’s really difficult to get a decent shot off in Trafalgar Square, because to get a decent angle, you have to move across the street, and that means waiting for the pink plumbing van to move from the stopped traffic in front of that nice looking church, or the giant double-decker bus with an ad that says “GET STUFFED!” to unblock your view (and to classy-up the photo a bit with its removal.) I suppose if I had a tripod and a stack of neutral density filters, I could do a 10-20 minute long exposure, and make it look like everyone had been wiped out, or something similarly creepy.

Then there were the times when I was trying to take a picture of something like the Olympic countdown clock, and I was patiently waiting my turn, and people just kept rudely jumping in front of me to photograph each other standing in front of it. Honestly, I have no idea why they’d want to pose in front of it, but nevertheless it’s still annoying that they kept jumping in front of me.

Photography is sometimes fraught with peril, and sometimes just flat out irritating.

On to the National Gallery, which is full of family pictures of Jesus. It’s a pretty building, but the layout of the place is kind of annoying. I went up the giant steps on the Trafalgar Square side, then went down 2 flights of steps to one cloakroom, only to be told there was no more room. So I had to go back up 2 flights, across the whole building, then down 2 more flights to another cloakroom to drop off my bags. Then back up 2 flights, halfway across the museum again to the Central Hall, just so I could start the tour I wanted to do in the proper order.

Sigh.

20 minutes lost just trying to put my bag away.

I picked up one of those audio guides again… am I the only person who gets grossed out when he thinks about using the same headphones that thousands of other people have used? It makes me shudder to even consider it. I yanked them out and put my own ear buds in, listened to a few descriptions, then promptly stopped using it. It just bogged me down. I really need to stop using those things.

The collection at the National Gallery is really good. It’s not top 3, but it’s definitely top 10. Only 1 Hieronymus Bosch, though. (“Christ Mocked,” if you want to know which painting.) One of these days, I want to see a bunch of his paintings. For someone who painted in the 15th century, his work has a great surrealistic feel to it. It reminds me of Dali’s work. Or maybe Dali reminds me of Bosch?

Note to self: Go to Madrid one of these days to see “The Garden of Earthly Delights” in the Prado.

Van Eyck’s “The Arnolfini Portrait” is another classic medieval painting. It was great to see a major painting like that up close.

I also got to see Botticelli’s “Venus and Mars,” which I think is an excellent painting. I love the pensive look on Venus’ face. I also enjoyed the El Grecos that they had there as well. I think he could have painted a children’s birthday party and it would still have had a haunting quality to it.

About halfway through my gallery run, I decided to have lunch. Once again, I was at the mercy of the floor plan of this building. I was in the Sainsbury Wing, which is where all of the 13th-15th century paintings are. On the 1st floor, there’s a dining hall, so I went down there to eat. I looked at the menu, and it was a sit-down, fancy food kind of place. (Oysters, meat dishes and pies sort of thing.) Definitely something that would consume many pounds and much more time than I could afford.

My only other choice was to go up a flight of stairs, go all the way across the museum, then go back down two flights of stairs to the Getty Entrance and eat at the cafe there. It was a sandwich shop kind of place. The drinks were a miss, though. The “Victorian Lemonade” was just gross.

Important lesson learned: ALWAYS read labels before you buy things here. Just because it says “Lemonade” doesn’t mean it’s going to TASTE like lemonade. It was some sort of lemons mixed with ginger and sugar and “aromatic herbs,” all carbonated, served lukewarm.

Gross.

The BLT was okay, although it was a bit weird, and the chocolate chip/hazelnut cookie wasn’t bad. The important thing was that I had calories to keep going.

Lunch completed, it was back to the art grind. My feet were killing me towards the end.

I really liked Boilly’s “A Girl at a Window.” I think it’s a print of a lost original, but I love the expression on her face and the composition. I also liked the “Portrait of Susanna Lunden” by Rubens. And of course the “Self Portrait at the Age of 64″ by Rembrandt was great. I love his expression in that painting.

I loved Renoir’s “The Umbrellas,” and saw a bunch of Van Goghs, including “Sunflowers,” which is fine, but I’m not too keen on the dark yellows. I like Van Gogh’s other stuff just fine, though. Of all on display, I like his “Wheatfield with Cypress” the most.

I was really more into the 19th and 20th century paintings, but alas, that was when I had realized that I had already spent FOUR HOURS there. All of the medieval and renaissance stuff just bogged me down.

The Monets, Manets, and Seurats were all good. It’s easy to remember that Seurat was into pointilism– “Seurat knew a lot about dots.”

There was a special exhibit on Italian altarpieces, which was interesting, but looking at religious artwork is like visiting shrines in Japan. I can only see so much of it before my eyes glaze over. Since I had already seen all of the 13th-15th century paintings, the altarpieces just kind of blended into the rest of them.

You can get a “60 minute tour” list of what the museum considers to be the most important pieces is there if you just want to hit the highlights. You can use the audio guide with it… but I wonder if you can actually do it all in 60 minutes. But it’s useful as a reference for what the curators think is important, because there are a lot of pieces by artists most people have never heard of that clutter up the place. Not that their work isn’t important, or isn’t worth preserving, it’s just that there’s just an awful lot of it, and while it’s good art, it’s not great art.

There are a few pieces on the “greats” list that I didn’t agree with. I didn’t particularly care for Constable’s, “The Hay Wain,” to be honest. It’s a pretty piece, but it didn’t particularly move me. I’ve already mentioned a few others above, like “Sunflowers.”

Anyway, at 4 p.m., it was time for a mad dash to the gift shop, where I bought a bunch of very tasteful blank cards and postcards. Now I can send people cards and impose my aesthetic sense on them at the same time. How convenient!

Shopping completed, it was off to SoHo to pick up my zoom lens, which was almost destroyed at Westminster the other day. I can see the bits of glass dust trapped in there, so it’s going to have to be stripped down when I get home. But it’s good enough for now.

I must say that Tottenham Court Road station is a royal pain to get to these days, because it’s not served by the Northern Line. You can only get to it via the Central line, and that means lots of transfers. Ugh.

Anyway, lens picked up, I stopped by a crepe shop called Crepeaffaire and had a delicious dark belgian chocolate crepe with whipped cream on the side. But it wasn’t cheap– that plus a cup of milk was almost 7 pounds. Yikes.

Then it was off to Baker Street, to see a Consulting Detective, or rather a Consulting Detetive’s Gift Shop. There was no way I was going to see the Sherlock Holmes Museum, because every tour guide says that it’s a ripoff, and I refuse to pay for another ripoff museum. But I wanted to get some Sherlockiana for my BSI sister.

The annoying bit? Even I, who is just a casual Holmes fan, got annoyed by the constant use of a Meerschaum pipe in all of the Holmes shadow portraits. He never used a Meerschaum pipe… yet there he is in every trinket, Meerschaum in hand, or hanging out of his mouth. So annoying.

Less-annoying trinkets purchased, I finally staggered back to Earl’s Court. That was it for me today.

London Loves the BL.

July 7th, 2011

It’s Thursday, and I had to move out of my double room today. Before I did that, I started to check over my camera from my trip to Westminster yesterday, and what do I find, but the UV filter on my 80-200mm lens is smashed to bits, and it’s bent into place. I forced out the broken glass with a pencil, and tried to shake out the bits, but only so much would come out. I knew I had to get it to a camera repair shop stat.

Note to self: don’t forget the lens brush next time, dummy. Also, add a layer of padding to the drop-in camera case.

So it was off to Calumet in SoHo… in a frogstrangler of a downpour with my crap umbrella. They pointed me down the alley to Sangean, who told me they could fix it by tomorrow for 76 pounds. That includes a new UV filter. While I was at Sangean, I asked them where to get a decent umbrella, because the one I got at Boots was just junk.

Here’s a tip: if you need an umbrella, NEVER buy one at a chemist’s/drugstore. It will always be a disappointment. The ones in コンビニ (conbini, Japanese for convenience store) suck, too.

The advice I got lined up with common sense: buy one at a department store at the very least.

Then I stopped by Calumet again and got a UV filter for the other lens. I realized that I could use one for the main lens, because I’ve been shooting with nothing on it. (I left the UV filter at home. D’oh.) After that, it was off to Marks & Spencer’s for a decent umbrella, because it was still raining like hell.

Ignoring the Hare Krishna who was trying to give me some sort of book, I headed into the store and made a beeline for the men’s department. I found a good umbrella, but it’s annoyingly big. It’s not a cane style umbrella, but it’s at least a foot and a half long. Maybe longer. It keeps me dry, but it doesn’t really fit in the backpack. So maybe 2 feet long? When I get back to the States, I’ll have to hunt down a good, compact umbrella that also expands to something BIG.

All of that fiddling around aside, I needed to do something. What to do, what to do, I’m in London, time’s a-wasting. It’s raining like hell, so it had better be indoor stuff. I know, let’s go look at the document that started it all, the Magna Carta!

So it was off to the British Library, up by King’s Cross.

It’s a neat place, but it’s a bit of a pain. You have to put everything in a locker, and to use the locker, you need a 1 pound coin handy. You get the coin back when you’re done, but troublesome things are still troublesome. I didn’t have a coin handy, and the smallest bill on me was a 20, so I had to withdraw 10 pounds from the ATM, then bust that into 10 1 pound coins, just to use the locker.

Pain in the butt.

Then it was off to look at some historical books and documents. I saw some quartos by Shakespeare, and notes from other famous authors like Milton, as well as compositions by Bach, Mozart and Beethoven, and the original score for Handel’s Messiah. Pretty cool if you ask me. There were also famous religious texts, including the Lindisfarne Bible, the Guttenberg Bible, and the King James Bible.

And, of course, a few copies of the Magna Carta.

What? You didn’t know? There isn’t just one copy of it. In fact, as many as 35 copies of it were made, and nobody knows which is the “original,” or if there ever really was an original, but if you go to the British Library, you can see two of them. It’s still pretty cool, if you’re into that sort of thing. You can also see the Papal bull that invalidates the original Magna Carta soon afterwards, because kings are chosen by God, and a bunch of scruffy nobles cannot put limits on God’s chosen kings on earth.

Yeah, yeah. Whatever. A somewhat-watered-down version was put back in force later on.

There was also an interesting exhibit on science fiction, and even a version of the TARDIS to look at, as well as an exhibit of Mervyn Peake’s works.

The gift shop was… a gift shop. I don’t remember buying anything there.

After that, it was back to Piccadilly, and the Japan Centre for lunch. It was time for pork ramen and some fried chicken, Japanese-style. Good food, although the ambience left a bit to be desired. There are only a couple of big picnic-table-style benches in the store, and a couple of tables outside. I probably should have eaten outside, but I didn’t have sunscreen on.

The ramen was served in a plastic bowl with a plastic Chinese-style spoon. Eating out of a plastic bowl only does so much for me. But like I said, the food was good, and in the end, that’s all that really matters. Another thing– when you order noodles there, you get a LOT of choices, down to 4-5 kinds of soup to put them in.

Then it was off to Covent Garden, and the London Transport Museum, because by this point, I am completely fresh out of ideas, and I like transportation stuff.

Some background: when I was kid, every summer we would go visit my grandpa in Chapel Hill from wherever it was we were living at the time, and for me, the most exciting part was the drive. Everything about the interstate highways was fascinating to me, probably because it was all new and different to me. I loved the process of going there. For me it was just as much fun as getting there, because there was so much to see along the way.

And when I would go to Germany and France to visit relatives, I fell in love with the Munich S-bahn and U-bahn trains, and the Deutsche Bundesbahn trains that took us to the Allgau and France’s Savoie region to visit family.

Whenever I go to a major city, I like to sample its mass transit system if it’s possible, because a city’s mass transit system says a lot about a city. Washington D.C.’s Metro feels very Federal, open and airy, while New York City’s Subway has a gritty charm all its own. Tokyo’s subways are different from the above ground trains, and the private lines are different from the JR lines, but they’re all clean and efficient in their own ways.

The Underground has an antique feel to it… New York’s Subway is pretty old, too, but the Underground has that crazy architecture that underlines its age. I really get that feeling when I pull into Earl’s Court, with its big glass roof. It feels like someone with muttonchops and a top hat will accost me at any moment.

I won’t say I’m a railroad/transportation nerd… I just have an appreciation for it, and I enjoy a nice train ride… and subways fascinate me as part of the underside of cities.

So with that in mind, it looked like the London Transport Museum would hit my strike zone.

The London Transportation Museum has a really good gift shop. You can get all kinds of cool Underground-branded stuff there.

Oh, the museum? Well, my 13 pounds got me in to see some exhibits on… err… okay, there are some cool things there, but not 13 pounds’ worth. You can look at a few 19th-century mockups of Underground carriages which were interesting, and there are a few double-decker buses through the ages that you can sit in, and even the front end of one you can pretend to drive, and all of this is probably great fun if you’re 11 years old.

There’s also a bit of London Underground memorabilia… which is somewhat interesting. I was hoping for more, really, but they only had a few cases’ worth. And that was pretty much it.

The main problem was that there just wasn’t a whole lot there, past the vehicles. It was okay, but not worth the outlay.

The gift shop was pretty good, though. I bought lots of souvenirsfor friends and family.

Would I recommend it? If you have kids and money to burn, yeah, maybe? Or if you can get free admission on one of those museum deal cards. Only on those conditions. Otherwise, skip it. (But the Underground logo ice cube tray will make an awesome gift for one of my friends…)

Covent Garden itself is a really nice part of town, with street performers and food vendors all over the place, and lots of shopping, if you’re into that sort of thing. Frankly, I wish I had spent more time wandering around Covent Garden, and skipped the museum.

There’s a lot you can learn from museums, but there’s also a lot you can learn from interacting with people.

After the museum, I had pretty much hit the wall, so I limped back to the hotel, ate some sandwiches, and called it a night.

The new room is 302. It’s a single, and much bigger than 114. The bed isn’t as good as 114, but I like having enough room for my bags. Also, the TV has a kind of weird red cast to it, but since I don’t watch much TV, it’s not a big deal. The showers still don’t do hot water properly. I haven’t had a room yet that does hot water properly. It usually goes from too hot to too cold to lukewarm, to generally unpleasant. Meh. I haven’t had a really good shower the whole time I’ve been here.

Pounded

July 6th, 2011

It’s Wednesday, and I’ve crested the hill of my trip to London. Today I had to move out of room 114, a nice little (emphasis on the word little) room, so I spent some time throwing everything into bags. I also had decided to send two boxes full of unneeded books home.

That turned out to be a not very bright idea.

You would think that sending things home by mail would save a lot of money. You might even think that sending books would entitle you to a book rate.

You would be very, very wrong.

The difference between sending 9 kilos of books home by surface mail (which takes 8 weeks), and by air mail (which takes 5 days) is 80 pounds vs 100 pounds.

Either way sucks. I need the books sooner than 8 weeks from now, and I really didn’t have the luggage room to spare anymore, so I had to take the full 100-pound hit. That’s $160 for the folks back home. Yeah, ouch indeed. Thanks for nothing, Royal Mail. I heart you too.

To be fair, the lady at the Post Office was very nice, and found a way to save me a few pounds. Still, using US Mail, this would have cost about $58… okay, maybe $58 per package. I might still have gotten screwed on the deal, but I’d have money left over for a meal or two.

After that,  I learned another important lesson: traveler’s cheques really aren’t worth the trouble.

I went to cash in my cheques at Lloyd’s TSB Bank, and took an absolute beating on the exchange rate. Sure, the current rate is in the $1.60 range, but when I got my money, I discovered that the rate I got was $1.75 per pound. And that was from one of the only banks that would actually honor the stupid things. The fees were hidden in the exchange rate.

So yeah, I’m never doing that again. I’ll carry an ATM card and cash. I’ll use plastic. But I won’t every carry cheques again.

When I used the ATM, I got hit with a 1% fee and a fixed $0.75 fee, but I got the market exchange rate. So $5.75 on $500, vs. $26.79 from the crap exchange rates using traveler’s cheques. Yeah. Lesson learned. USE A FREAKIN’ CALCULATOR!

Speaking of credit cards, good luck using them in England. I pretty much gave up on them, outside of hotels.

Of course, both of my credit cards will smack me in the head with a 3% foreign transaction fee anyway, but it’s still cheaper than the $26.79 I lost on the traveler’s cheques. ($15 on a theoretical $500 purchase.)

And that’s why nobody uses them anymore.

After handing over large sums of cash to people behind bullet-proof glass (now I know why it was bullet-proof, even at the post office), it was time to head over to another place where people generally take large sums of money from people and spend it unwisely.

Yes, Parliament.

I arrived at Westminster, and joined the crush of touroids wobbling around the Palace of Westminster, looking for the visitor’s entrance. The guard there told me to come back in 2 hours.

So I went over to the Churchill War Rooms at the Imperial War Museum, and the Winston Churchill Museum, both of which were very cool. Lots of shuffling around in the dark, and listening to Winston Churchill.

I learned a lot. He liked painting, whiskey, and gambling. He was a liberal, then a conservative, a POW who escaped from South Africa, and the second honorary US Citizen since Lafayette. I even saw his US passport. He was also grouchy.

I highly recommend visiting it if you have any kind of interest in World War II, or Winston Churchill. The latter obviously helps. It’s very interesting to see how they lived while trying to run a war under constant threat of German bombing raids. It’s also worthwhile to get a peek into the mind of Churchill, who was a fascinating man.

After that, I headed back to Westminster Palace, where I began an complex ritual that consisted of varied intervals of standing in line and sitting on benches. First, I stood in line to go through security. They take your picture, print it on a paper badge, and that’s your pass. Then they scan your bags, and let you in. Then you can wander around a bit. (Just a bit, mind you.)

Then I went off to Westminster Hall, which is big. Very big. It’s also very old. It was completed in 1099, and survived a fire in 1834. The woodwork in the ceiling is gorgeous, and well, it’s just impressive. Enough looking. It’s time to go stand in line to go up to the public gallery for the House of Commons!

As the line moved ever so slowly, I eventually made it to a big wooden bench, where we sat for about 15 minutes, then got whisked off upstairs to St. Stephen’s Hall, where we sat on another bench. While we sat on the benches there, we could look at big frescos of scenes of Famous English People doing Famous Things. And we repeated the process of moving from one bench to another and then another. Four benches in St. Stephen’s Hall, and then we could finally go up to the Central Lobby.

The Central Lobby is the place where people can, well, lobby their MPs. From there, we went up the stairs to another security room, where we had to drop off our bags and cell phones.

Then it was off to the gallery, where I got to watch the emergency debate over the News of the World phone hacking scandal. Very historic, or so I’ve been told by every BBC commentator on TV in the past 48 hours.

It was interesting to see the debates… although you can’t really call it a debate when politicians all get up and say that criminal activities are bad. When journalists or anyone for that matter engages in hacking that destroys evidence, well, that’s wrong. Duh. The sun is also hot, ice is cold, and Jerome Bettis is from Detroit.

On the way out, I realized that I had lost my Oyster card, with 25 pounds still on it. D’oh. So I ran back up to the security station at the public gallery, and sure enough, they had already found it for me. Woot.

Then it was time to buy a few souvenirs, then shuffle back to the hotel and check out the new room, number 117. It’s nice, although the mattress isn’t as nice as the old room. It’s a bit thin and kind of worn-out, as though it has seen a few too many chunky Americans who have worn the stuffing out of it. I can deal with it for one night.

On the upside, the room is nice and big, and otherwise comfortable, although, oddly enough, the smaller room had a nicer bathroom with a bigger shower and a bit nicer view. The window over the bathroom sink is a bit weird, but I can adapt.

Dinner was the local Wagamama on the high street around Earl’s Court. Wagamama is a chain of Japanese restaurants in London. Everything on the menu comes with chicken of some sort, it seems. No pork in sight. Kind of a bummer there. The yakisoba was good; lots of vegetables in it, plus shrimp and, of course, chicken in it, as well as some delicious crunchy fried onion bits. It was nice to sit at right in front of the second-floor window and just stare at the crowds walking by the high street.

After that, a trip to the Sainsbury’s for a few supplies, and back to the hotel.

I took the chance to do some laundry in the sink, and used the heated towel rack to speed up the drying.

My “No Cotton” rule has saved my bacon on this trip. It makes washing shirts, underwear, and socks in the sink a breeze. They all dry out relatively quickly, too.

Wandering Around Piccadilly Circus

July 5th, 2011

My first stop today was Piccadilly Circus, where there’s a neat used Japanese book store called Adanami. It’s in an old dry cleaner’s, and when I got there, I could still see the old dry cleaner’s sign. However, I got there just a little too early, because they were still closed. They open at noon, and it was still 11:45.

So I headed down the street to kill some time, and found the Vintage Magazine Store, and looked around in there. I checked out their vintage magazines in the basement. They have a nice collection, but it’s all on the expensive side. I was scouting it out for my brother-in-law, who often uses old magazines as references for his graphic design work.

Upstairs, they had an interesting selection of post cards and birthday cards, as well as movie-related novelties. I did manage to score some funny birthday cards, so it was a success.

Time successfully killed, it was on to Adanami to search for used Japanese books. The prices there were pretty good for the most part, but I didn’t have a whole lot of luck finding the books that I wanted. I was interested in finding some books on 国語 (sort of like Language Arts for Japanese), but didn’t find anything that struck my fancy. I did find a copy of Harry Potter. It was a bit pricey for a used copy, but it’s getting harder to find it in Japanese.

FYI– no credit card accepted there. Bring cash. They also have a karaoke box in the back, if that’s your thing.

After that, I headed to a Korean restaurant in the neighborhood called Soju, and had a really good bulgogi lunch set meal. Bulgogi is a Korean dish of marinated beef that’s been grilled, and I also got some kimchee along with it, as well as some pickled mung bean sprouts and rice.

Considering how paranoid everyone is about bean sprouts and other salad ingredients in Europe these days, I ate them without really considering it. But there were no problems, so it’s all good.

The only downside was that the chopsticks were metal and kind of thin, so it was hard getting them to work. I’m much better at using wooden chopsticks than plastic or metal. A spoon came with the chopsticks, but there was no way I was going to wimp out and use the spoon.

After lunch, I headed back towards the station, and then towards Mitsukoshi’s basement, where the books are. I wanted to have a good look over them before I headed out, because I can’t look over them at home. They have a really good selection on Japanese learning, even though they’re all pretty exepensive. If nothing else, you can check them out and then buy online from someplace like BK1. I found a really good book on business Japanese that I haven’t seen anywhere else, so I decided to take the monetary hit and buy it. (36 pounds. Ouch!)

Then it was over to the Japan Centre again to look at their books and to see if they had anything else interesting, but nothing really jumped out at me. They didn’t even have Men’s Pocky.

I headed back to the hotel to rest for a bit and to pack my packages of books to send home tomorrow. Box wrestling, commence!

Packages packed, this evening was my first encounter with the rain in England. And rain it did, violently hard. My Gore-Tex jacket was barely able to keep me dry, and my nylon hiking pants were getting soaked fast. So I dashed to Boots’, and stared at umbrellas for about 15 minutes. I figured that it wouldn’t really matter which one I picked, because they would all kind of suck, so I got the most compact one for 10 pounds, and sure enough, it sucked. It barely covered my head and made sure I got completely soaked.

Then it was off to Tokyo Spicy, for a katsudon. Yum. They make an awesome katsudon.

Caution: 175 Steps.

July 4th, 2011

Test’s over. My brain still resembles Jell-O, but it’s time to be a tourist.

So let’s start off big. How about the British Museum? Big enough for you?

It’s big enough for me.

I headed off to the Russell Square Tube station, and encountered a sort of tube station that I haven’t encountered before. There are no escalators, just 3 giant elevators, and a spiral staircase with 175 steps and a warning that is no joke. When my train pulled in, the access to the lifts was jam-packed.

It looked like it would take a while, so like a dummy, I thought, “Well hell, it’s only 175 steps. How bad can it be?”

Bad.

Very bad.

Remember how I said I’ve seen people make luggage mistakes before? I saw someone make a luggage mistake that looked like it could very well be fatal– someone trying to lug a giant suitcase up these stairs.

That’s nuts.

I was having a hard time just trying to get my chunky American frame up the stairs. 175 steps… that has to be what? 12 stories? I stopped more and more frequently as I got near the top, because I was starting to see bright lights and hear the voices of what could be dead relatives beckoning. Turns out it was just the main station.

The downside of my stupid escapade on the stairs was that it took a lot out of me. That was energy and strength that I would need for my assault on the British Museum, which is no less of a monster than the stairs at Russell Square Station.

To get to the museum from the station, I cut straight across Russell Square Park, which is a lovely green area, then dodged the crazy traffic in the circle, walked down a street, turned a corner, and bam! It’s huge.

The British Museum is not to be trifled with.

It’s free to get in (well, you should make a donation), but things like maps, guides, and audioguides all cost money. And if you want an audioguide, be prepared to leave some sort of photo ID, like a driver’s licence or a passport behind.

If you’re taking a camera, the museum is camera-friendly. Take pictures of whatever you want. Seriously, go for it. They don’t care one bit. I had fun, because most American and Japanese museums would wig out at that idea.

Here’s the rub– if you take the audioguide and you carry a camera around your neck, you are in for suffering. I had both, and both annoyed the hell out of me. I wound up never using the guide, anyway, as everything in the museum is well-labeled.

Bah.

First off was the treasures of Ancient Greece. Lots of neat stuff, none of which I can remember the names of. I am terrible and uncultured person. But it was all very impressive, and I took lots of pictures. The bits they took from the Acropolis were very moving, as were the sculptures of the heads of the four major philosophers, and the sculpture of Alexander the Great.

Then it was off to Egypt. I was more interested in the sculptures than the mummies, to be honest. I always thought that the obsession with the display of old dead bodies to be kind of gruesome, yet that was the part of the museum that was the most jam-packed. Figures. I think there should be a rule that any archaeologist that displays a body in a museum also has to be displayed in a museum when they die for hordes of sweaty future tourist to gawk at.

It’s only fair.

After these two sections, my legs are starting to die off, because this museum is HUGE, and my hiking shoes are 4 years old, and on their way out. I know I only have one more section left in me, and then I’ll have to turn tail and run back. So I decided to head to the Japan section. (Hey, that’s my main interest.) It was a nice display that carries you from the Jomon period all the way to modern Japan.

Ok, now I’m totally beat, so it’s time to shuffle back to Earl’s Court.

I went to the office supply store on the high street on the way back to the hotel to buy boxes, packing tape, and a magic marker, because I need to get rid of these books I don’t need. I don’t want to have to carry them back with me on the plane, and I want to have more room for souvenirs.

At least that’s the logic.

Not sure about dinner tonight. Nando’s again? Or maybe just more sandwiches?

JLPTeed Off

July 3rd, 2011

Well, today was the big test. The one I traveled 3,940 miles and paid a few thousand dollars for. I honestly don’t think I did any better than I did when I took it in December.

So very frustrating.

I know my Japanese is better. I know I can speak better, and listen better, and even read better. But that awful excuse for a test is like a game show designed to prove to contestants that “You don’t know Jack about Japanese.”

At least that’s what it felt like.

Oh, but before that, there was needless lining up outside, and waiting while each person’s ID was checked before they were sent on to the appropriate testing room.

Why not just open up the building and check IDs in the rooms?

So the test started late. The line was huge, and moved really slowly, and as a result, people were panicked when they finally got to the room, through no fault of their own.

As for the test itself, it was awful.

The JLPT is a bad test to begin with, and now they’ve just gone and made it worse.

The grammar and reading section is horrible. You get 105 minutes, which is never enough, to do 55 grammar problems which start from easy and rapidly go to WTF? hard.

Then with whatever time is left, you have to finish 20 reading questions, which is almost always impossible, unless you are the Japanese Evelyn Wood, in which case, why are you even bothering with this stupid test? You don’t need this.

I spent a lot of time before the test working on my reading, and I never could get to the speed they want for this thing. I just can’t do it. My reading speed isn’t terrible, it’s just not at the level where I can read an editorial in 3 minutes, then answer 4 questions in another minute. Seriously?

My coping mechanism for the test was to just jump straight to the reading section, and just use whatever time was left on the grammar section… sort of. I skipped all of the single-question reading problems, and went straight to the one passage, 3-question problems, to maximize my chances of passing the section.

But I don’t think it worked.

While I could understand the passages, for some reason, the words just bounced off of my brain and would not compute. And the questions just didn’t not make any sense at all. It was bad. I did manage to limp through the section, though, and finish it, but I’m not excited.

Then I breezed through the grammar section. It didn’t seem as bad as last time, except for the ★ problems, which this time seemed to be particularly nasty. Oh, and the compound grammar problems were mean as usual. It’s hard to prepare for them, because nobody can put out a good book full of practice problems for some reason.

The compound grammar problems have answers that combine two grammar points in each answer like A&B, A&C, D&B and D&C. Pick one. Go on, hurry up. Time’s a’wastin’!

I’ve spent countless hours in my car and in my house, listening to all kinds of nonsense in Japanese, and when it came to the listening section of the exam, they had managed to find two fast-talkers to play the game of “Hide the Football.”

Here’s how it works. Get the guy who always reads the fine print at the end of a radio commerical, then get the lady who also does it. Now get them to have a conversation about what they’re going to do about something. Something really vague. Now have them dither about what they’re going to do first. Are they going to walk the dog? Water the plants? Feed the bird? Or set the house on fire? Hmm… what should we do… Hey, let’s go eat pasta, then feed the bird to the dog, and set the house plants on fire! Wait, that’s not an answer, dammit!

Now give us, the test taker, about 15 seconds to figure out what one of them is going to do next. Hurry up!

For the most part, the listening section was easy… or so I think. But the way the test is designed, I’m almost positive that I didn’t score as highly as I think I did. There are 5 “problems,” each with a number of questions attached. The hide the football questions make up one problem. Another problem is the “rapid response” section, where in 11 questions, you’ll hear someone say something, then you get 3 choices. Quick, pick the best one! You only hear them once, so hurry up!

The last problem is usually a massively long question, and it usually turns on something you hear briefly in the very beginning, and if you miss it, you are royally screwed, because it all hinges on that first bit. Might as well just fill in 4 random dots. There’s a set up of some sort of system, like “I have 4 dogs for sale, one is big and hairy, one smells, one is little and shakes, and one sleeps all day.” Then two people will talk about how much they love coffee, and hey, if you got a dog, which one would you get? “I want a pink one.” “Really? I want an orange one.” Now, which of the 4 dogs for sale would person A buy? Which would person B buy?

Something like that.

The added sucky bit is that we don’t get results until mid-September, which is really too late to do anything about the December test, unless I take it somewhere not in the US, because of the time it will take for the results to get to me from the UK…

Meh. I’ll think of something. Who knows? Maybe I passed… yeah, I’m not going to go there.

I do know that I have to seriously think about my study approach. My environment is only carrying me so far.

OMG Muffins @_@

July 2nd, 2011

I finally discovered Gregg’s, which has awesome sandwiches, and these evil chocolate chip muffins, filled with PUDDING. Or maybe it’s some sort of chocolate pastry creme?

Either way, good God y’all, if you sold these in America, my fellow countrymen would start randomly exploding.

The sandwiches at Gregg’s remind me a bit of some of the sandwiches in Japan. They have that big, giant fluffy sweet bread you get at the Japanese bakeries. It’s good stuff. It’s not the most healthy stuff in the world, but it does scratch a certain culinary itch. Add in a lemon ice Fanta (my latest obsession, which reminds me of my misspent youth in Germany), and one of those evil muffins, and I’m good to go.

Other than gorging myself on sandwiches, Fanta, and muffins, I pretty much stayed in the room all day and studied.

Test is tomorrow. Blech.

Crossed Up at King’s Cross

July 1st, 2011

I met up with Michele (pronounced the men’s way, not the women’s way) from Italy today. He’s someone who also posts on the RTK forums, and is really good at Japanese. He’s also in town to take on the JLPT N1. We had a bit of a mess at first trying to meet up. We agreet to meet at Kings Cross/Saint Pancras, since that’s the neighborhood where the test is going to take place on Sunday. What neither one of us realized was that there are two national railway stations there: one is called King’s Cross, and one is called Saint Pancras. (Hence the / in the name.)

So when I asked him where he was, he said he was in front of the Starbuck’s in the station. That’s odd, I didn’t see a Starbuck’s. But I did see a Burger King. Well, he didn’t see a Burger King at all. So I moved to the wicket in front of platform 2, and he agreed to move in that general direction, thinking that maybe we were just on different floors. We even tried waving. After 10 minutes or so, we finally broke down and started asking around for ideas. Then we found out why we couldn’t see each other.

No, we weren’t in parallel universes.

He was in Saint Pancras railway station, and I was in King’s Cross railway station. One is right next to the other.

After finally meeting up, we headed over to the School of Oriental and African Studies (SOAS) campus of the University of London at Vernon Rise, where Sunday’s test will be. It wasn’t too hard to find.

Then it was off to Piccadilly Circus and Mitsukoshi for lunch. Mitsukoshi has a nice restaurant. The food presentation is very attractive, and very standard Japanese. I get the feeling that the intention is to make Japanese tourists feel like they’re “home,” more than it is to bring a taste of Japan to London. Anyway, I had the steamed veg and sashimi set meal for 14 pounds, and that was one of the cheaper ones. It was very good, but yeah, not cheap.

Lunch properly eaten, we did some browsing around Mitsukoshi’s book shop. What’s interesting about Mitsukoshi is that they don’t really sell a lot of Japanese “stuff,” instead they sell a ton of English souvenirs to Japanese tourists. Again, it’s the whole, “Hey, this is a store that caters to you” vibe. Kind of disappointing, really. They did have a good book store, but the prices were hideous. It was yet another case of, “Don’t you mean dollars instead of pounds?” A lot of cheap books, 1800 yen books, were going for 35 pounds. Yikes.

After being scared away by the expensive books, we headed over to the Japan Centre, to look at their smaller selection of books. Japan Centre is neat, because they actually have Japanese products. Downside, again, is OMG high prices. Also, book selection is much smaller than Mitsukoshi, and the prices aren’t any better. The upside of Japan Centre is that it has a lot of Japanese products, like food and other things. It also has a restaurant that I’ll have to try later.

We looked around a bit more, and then headed back to the Piccadilly Circus tube station, and called it a day.

I headed back to the room, crashed for a bit, studied some, then headed off to Nando’s, a Portugese-style chicken chain. Good stuff. The store is a little chaotic, but the chicken is tasty. It’s in some kind of sauce, but it’s a yummy sauce. The downside is that it’s not too cheap. 9 pounds for a meal. Welcome to London.

Paddington Bares All

June 30th, 2011

First a word about where I’m staying. It’s a hotel called Base2Stay in Kensington, about 5 minutes’ walk from the Earl’s Court Tube station. London hotels are ungodly expensive, and when researching a place to stay, I came upon horror story after horror story about cheap hotels that had crap service, or no air conditioning, or smelled funny, or were in crummy locations, or whatever hotel horror you want to imagine. All at a price I could not afford.

I have to say, Base2Stay is pretty nice so far. For ~105 pounds a night, I’m getting a clean room with a personal A/C / heater, a mini-kitchen, which few hotels can boast in the 100-pound range, and a nice bathroom with a towel heater, which is downright handy for drying clothes. And the people here are really nice in the “go way out of their way” nice, plus they’ll shower you with restaurant coupons, should you so desire.

Now, room 114 is tiny. Microscopically so. It’s smaller than just about any hotel room I stayed in when I did my grand tour of Japan, and if you’ve read my Japan trip entries, you know I stayed in some tiny freakin’ rooms. So I was quite surprised when I saw what my 105 pounds was getting me.

But in spite of that, it’s a nice little room with all the amenities I need– even a decent-sized shower. (But the shower head is too low, and the water can’t make up its mind if it wants to freeze or scald me on a regular basis.) Is it perfect? No, but it’s a really good little place to crash that’s cheap for London, and expensive for most of America.

Anyway, on to the day’s activities… what excitement awaits? Well, today I got the phone straightened out. It wasn’t internet-ing properly, so I had to take it by Car Phone Warehouse to have them fiddle with it for a few minutes to get it to use the 3Gs properly.

Then I decided to head to Paddington station to see about some lunch. Nothing really grabbed me inside the station as a lunch source, so I went outside and started wandering.

I found a nice little deli outside of the station, and had a chicken salad baguette and a coke for 3.50. Not bad for London. I went back to the station and did some grocery shopping at the Sainsbury’s there, and discovered that yes, my US credit card doesn’t work there. I’m not even going to bother, I think. If I just pay cash, a) it’s more painful, so b) I’ll spend less, and c) I will know when I’m spending money, because I will experience it in a more visceral fashion.

Spotted in Paddington Station, two things: 1. A statue of Paddington Bear. (Of course.) 2. A Krispy Kreme. (They really ARE everywhere.)

I went back to the room to study for the test after that.

Of course I bought doughnuts.

In the evening, I decided to go out for dinner for a break. First, I stopped by Boots’, the chemist’s shop, to pick up some liquid shower soap. Nivea for Men for 1 pound. Sounded cheap, and I’ll smell manly in a Euro way.

Then I headed on to Tokyo Spicy, a relatively new Japanese restaurant a few stores down from the Italian place I ate at the other day. The food was very good. I had okonomiyaki, which I haven’t had since I was in Osaka in 2007. I had it with pork this time. Yum. Wasn’t a big fan of the ginger beer, though. I prefer American ginger ale. The ginger beer was too sweet, and wasn’t very spicy. Give me Blenheim’s Ginger Ale any time. Mmmmm.

After that, I headed to Cafe del Coin, because the sign said they had crepes. They did not. They did have this chocolate caramel thing however, that was crunchy and went well with a cappuccino. Good enough for me. (I would have really liked a chocolate and whipped cream crepe, though.)

Then back to the room to study. I love the room, but good lord, it’s tiny. That said, it has just about everything I need, except a real desk and chair. It would be nice to sit on something besides the bed for a change of pace.

The flight from Heck

June 29th, 2011

I made it to London safely, but it wasn’t without a few snags. For starters, the flight was overbooked. That was because the Sunday flight was cancelled, and they were trying to cram as many people on board as possible. But there was no way a mere $800 voucher was going to be enough to keep me from taking my rightful crummy seat on the plane.

After the delay of sorting out who was going to get to board and who was not, we all got on the plane, and sat there at the gate.

And sat there.

And sat there.

We sat there for two hours because there were thunderstorms in the area, and the ground crews weren’t allowed outside to service the plane until the storms had passed for about 15 minutes.

So we sat there some more.

We finally got off the ground at about 8:15 or so– horribly late, but it couldn’t be helped.

I sat next to a nice guy from Kenya who was very big. Not fat, mind you, just a big, strong person. So we were both a little uncomfortable as we were crammed into those tiny little seats with our bulky bodies. And the guy sitting in front of me was headed to Afghanistan, so I agreed to let him recline a little. I know he’s not going to get much in the way of comfort for a while, so it was the least I could do.

Naturally, I suffered for my kindness. (Because no good deed goes unpunished, and I was sitting right in front of the bulkhead, so I had all of 3 inches of reclining room.) My poor knees were bruised when I got to London. I’m never sitting in front of the bulkhead again. Well, not in coach, anyway.

We got to Heathrow at around 8:50 in the morning London time, completely blowing everyone’s schedules to bits, and causing just about everyone who had a connecting flight to miss it. Lucky me, I didn’t have a connection to make.

Border control was uneventful. The line was long and moved slowly, but again, uneventful. One thing you might want to keep in mind– they want the address of the place you’re going to be staying at in the UK for the landing card, so it would be useful to print that out or write it on your hand, or something.

Customs was nonexistent. No, really. There was nobody there to check my bags for anything. I spent all of that effort to get all of those doctors’ notes, only to find out that nobody here cared.

Dammit.

Wait, am I upset that I wasted the effort, or am I happy that I didn’t have to go through the frustration of having my bags forcefully unpacked again? Am I an idiot or what? Of course I’m happy that I didn’t have to go through the hassle of a customs inspection.

Sort of.

Ah, I suppose I should explain first. You see, I travel with a variety of medications, one of which happens to be on the list of Controlled Substances. So in order to travel with this medicine without getting a nice pair of steel bracelets from angry border officials, I like to make sure I have all of the necessary paperwork done. The last time I went to Japan, even though I had the right paperwork, I still got hassled.

So before heading to the UK, I spent about 2 weeks trying to find out just what the hell the rules were, and got all kinds of interesting answers. I played all sorts of variations of phone tag, one version of which included a Home Office official claiming that the Home Office did not have jurisdiction over controlled substances. (This is the equivalent in the US of a DEA agent saying, “We don’t handle drug offenses.”)

Eventually I found a web page on the Home Office website with some loose guidelines, and just closed my eyes and got as many notes and papers as I could.

Turns out it was all a waste of time, because apparently nobody in England gives a %^&* about what’s in my bags when I get off the plane. So while I was relieved that I didn’t have, I was still mad that I had wasted so much effort gathering paperwork. (One of my doctors even charged me $25 US for a travel letter, and wouldn’t even write the damn thing until I had sent him the money. Sheesh.)

Getting to the hotel from the airport was a bit of a pain, mostly because I had never done it before, so I was completely confused. I have to admit in a moment of honesty it’s kind of fun in a strangely masochistic kind of way. Don’t read too much into that.

I found the Heathrow Express to Paddington okay, but missed the first train. The second train pulled in, but we were told that we weren’t allowed to ride it unless we had first class tickets, which is just as well, because it turns out that it was going to stop at a hojillion places along the way. There’s no express in that. Finally, I could get on the third train, which showed up after about 10 minutes total of waiting.

I pulled into Paddington, and was slightly bewildered. So many places to eat. I was hungry, tired, and carrying tons of crap. So glad I only had the one suitcase, but wishing the backpack didn’t weigh 35 pounds. It didn’t feel that heavy, just really bulky.

I finally figured out where the Tube was, and made my way there. Then I saw a sign that regretfully informed me of “Severe Delays” on the District Line, which was supposed to take me to Earls Court.

Well, that’s no good.

So I stared at the sign some, in hopes that some more useful information would come forth.

It didn’t come forth.

I stared some more, because I was jet-lagged and feeling about 40-50 points dumber than usual.

It still didn’t come forth.

So I saw a window with a sign that said “Tickets and Assistance.” “Well,” I thought, “I could use some assistance.” So naively, I stood in line. Then I overheard a woman complain bitterly in German that the people behind the window were very “unfreundlich.” So, I lowered my expectations appropriately, and the man behind the window did not fail to disappoint. When I asked him how I should get to Earls Court, he said “Go to platform 1 and take a bus.”

And that was that.

I have no idea what lies at platform 1, or which buses I can take, so I stared stupidly at the bus map for 10-15 minutes until giving up, grabbing a Tube map, and just figuring out that if I ride enough trains, I can go around whatever is clogging up the District Line.

So I did just that. I rode the pink line, whatever it’s called, to Hammersmith, and caught the Piccadilly line there to go to Earls Court.

By the way, there are no lifts at Earls Court for luggage right now. It’s brutal.

In fact, I highly recommend not traveling at all with luggage if you can possibly swing it.

I’m being serious.

I have been party to some pitiful scenes, and seen many more pitiful scenes of others like me carrying bloated, obscenely heavy suitcases through places they were not meant to be carried.

Places like Earls Court train station.

Or JR Nara.

But there are far worse places than those two.

Anyway, I made it to the hotel after 2 hours of fumbling around on the trains, and managed to dump my bags there and freshen up in the lobby WC.

Then it was off to Gourmet Burger Kitchen for lunch, which was a chicken sandwich, chips (fries–whatever), and lots of lemonade with no free refills, and then Marks & Spencers for foodstuffs.

After check-in, the nice folks at Base2Stay had kindly moved my bags into my room for me (thank you very much), so all I had to do was drop off a few things, then head to Car Phone Warehouse to pick up a Vodaphone pay-as-I-go SIM card for my phone.

That evening, I found a little Italian place that made a decent cheese pizza, because it’s a habit of mine.

Last weird thing: the sun sets at 9:45 p.m. or so, and rises at around 3:45 a.m. Very weird. It’s making me goofy already.